The Real Gift

So further to yesterday's post, I wanted to talk some more about what I've learned in the last 24 hours of Vivienne McMaster's class, Wading In.

First of all, let me just say I am in love with the b&w setting on my camera. I think the nuances and quality of the light show better in b&w and there's less distraction for the eye. I tried sepia as well, but b&w won out.

I felt really good about the images I took on that setting. They seemed more artistic somehow. It's probably got alot to do with the lines feeling cleaner. There's nothing I love better than beautiful, clean lines. I notice them all the time, in architecture, in nature, in the profile of my gorgeous dog Indy...

I am also enjoying the exchange of ideas. A fellow student was talking about how when you are publishing, you're often asked to include a photo of yourself. I've always found that really challenging because I don't really have any that I like. Well, no more! I am grooving on the idea of having a selection of self portraits that I can choose from the next time I'm asked. I'll have some artsy images, created by ME, not just some lame run-of-the-mill, make-do headshot.

Like perhaps this? I did this this morning, in about 5 minutes. I'd say it would make a pretty cool bio pic. It says more about me than a regular everyday photo does. Being able to to shoot my own self portraits is really quite empowering. I'm seeing myself through a whole new lense.

That first photo I posted, The Blessing was a gift of light and experimentation. I love how the individual strands of my hair picked up the light and the angle I shot it at. It looked to me like the light was blessing me.

The real gift in this is how in a few short hours, in a handful of photos, I've begun to see myself differently. The filters are changing. I've been deeply angry with my body for such a very long time {which is part of the grieving process when you live with an incurable, life-altering disease} that I'd forgotten there was anything beautiful about it. Maybe as this process unfolds, I will become gentler with myself.